Sunday, July 25, 2010

On Traveling Solo

One thing that has been interesting about my trip around Europe is that many people are amazed that I have been traveling alone. I can now say though that it has been the best decision I could make for myself.

Of course it has it's downsides, everything does, but that fact that it is such a challenge and forces you out of your shell has for me been a godsend.

I think everyone suffers from a degree of self confidence issues, and traveling alone in a foreign country is no picnic. At least not until you jump that initial hurdle and take a few risks to test your wanderlust out and give it some really legs.

For a long time I felt like i have been stuck in a bubble concerning myself and how I feel and my life situation. With nearly a year of hardship in trying to find work, five years of being single and living my days out in the Midwest where my heart told me I did not belong, i wasn't exactly feeling great about my self as a person. I felt directionless and depressed for much of it, and felt that in some way that there was nothing I could do to change it. And that moving would nor help, and perhaps would worsen my problem and make me feel isolated, hurt my dignity and pride in being independent, and provide me more problems then solutions.

I was so very wrong that it's comical.

I could not have made a better decision to move back home and from there to make the preparations for going overseas.

Traveling alone gives you something new; a fresh sense that you can truly conquer the world and that despite every crisis, everything will always be okay. It teaches you to trust your gut. To wander. To know you are a unit and whole in yourself.

I feel now better about myself as a human being. Traveling alone is like having an inward dance with your darker parts and then showing them the light. It is crushing feelings of inadequesy and thoughts of woe and fear of the unknown. It is intensely personal and a raw emotional shake down of the sagging bits of your soul that you must discard in order to survive and keep going.

It's in your face. I love it. And I would reccomend it to anyone the world over.

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